Most of us can agree that the majority of the societies in this world are patriarchal, therefore if you are born a male, you have automatic male privileges. Men hold the positions of power in society and have control over most of the world. This includes control over decisions that affect women.
A lot of negative sexist ideologies have been taught about females in society. We are told that women are the "weaker" sex, we are told that women are inferior to men, we are told that women are "too emotional" to make decisions therefore they cannot lead. Some sections of the media promotes the idea that women are sexual objects. Society perpetuates misogynistic narratives towards women. This includes blaming women for the behaviours of men.
I am going to look at this in context of rape and sexual assault. Rape culture is a culture where social attitudes normalise sexual abuse and blame the victims for their assaults.
The legal definitions (in the UK) for Rape and Sexual Assault are found in the Sexual Offences Act 2003 as follows:
Section 1 - Rape
(1) A person (A) commits an offence if—
(a) he intentionally penetrates the vagina, anus or mouth of another person (B) with his penis,
(b) B does not consent to the penetration, and
(c) A does not reasonably believe that B consents.
Section 3 - Sexual Assault
(1) A person (A) commits an offence if—
(a) he intentionally touches another person (B),
(b) the touching is sexual,
(c) B does not consent to the touching, and
(d) A does not reasonably believe that B consents.
I am sure you are all aware of the #MeToo Movement, which was birthed out of women who were victims of sexual abuse. This movement became viral in 2017 and has helped to give a voice to women who have been victims of sexual abuse and to call out the male perpetrators. We have heard about Harvey Weinstein, Bill Cosby, R Kelly etc famous men who have been accused by numerous women for sexual abuse. There is also the SlutWalk movement which was popularised by Amber Rose which aims to end rape culture. This movement was started when a female was raped in Canada, and when she had reported this to the Police, she was told that she should have dressed differently to avoid being raped.
The issue in this society is that there is a victim blaming culture where women are blamed for men sexually abusing and raping them. Some women are told that they were raped because of how they dressed, or because they were drunk, or for being alone with a man at night. Some female victims internalise this and believe that it is their fault that they were raped/abused. However, instead of blaming the man who should be taught NOT to rape or abuse women, we instead tell females "do not do X so you won't get raped". Don't get me wrong, as women we do need to take precautions as there are a lot of crazy people out there. However, despite the situation a woman may find herself in, it doesn't justify her being raped/sexually abused.
It all starts with how males are socialised in terms of their views towards females and sex. Many males, especially in their younger years are conditioned to see sex as a sport rather than an act of intimacy. They are encouraged by their peers (and sometimes older males) to lose their virginity at a young age and to sleep with as many females as they possibly can because it makes them a "man". Males are celebrated for having numerous sexual partners, therefore some males do this so that they can brag to their friends. This is a big problem right here, because there are males who will go to great lengths just to sleep with a female. There are males who purposely prey on vulnerable females, there are males who manipulate and pressure females into sleeping with them and say things like "if you love me you will have sex with me". If you are a female and a male says this to you RUN!. There are males who only view women for their sexual pleasure , and once they get what they want they will dispose of her like a toy. These type of men have no regard for female's feelings.
There are some males who feel that they are entitled to a woman's body. Males who think like this are dangerous. They think it is ok to touch a woman inappropriately, (i.e. Donald Trump who talks about grabbing women by the pussy"). This is sexual assault and is VERY common. I am sure that the majority of females have been victims of sexual assault at least once in their life. I have on multiple occasions and I've also witnessed it happen to other females. Whether it is a man touching your bum, or rubbing his hands on your thigh, or trying to touch you up, it is all Sexual Assault. I've realised when confronting these perpetrators they act like they have done nothing wrong and do not see what is wrong with their behaviour.
Some men feel so entitled to women that when a women rejects their sexual advances, they are quick to insult her or even physically harm her. The worst case I heard was in America when a young woman was shot and killed by a man because she had rejected his advances at a club. It is scary being a female as there are many scary situations you have to deal with. This includes dealing with harassment from men, this includes men following you in their car while you are walking alone, this includes walking pass a group of men who then shout out sexual comments towards you. I remember walking home one evening alone, and a man came up to talk to me, I made it clear that I wasn't interested and he said he won't leave me alone until I gave him my number, which I refused to do. He was following me very closely, I was scared. Luckily, as I was nearing my house he finally left. It is sad that being born a female exposes you to such scary and potentially dangerous situations.
There are men who cannot control their sexual desires and urges and even go to the lengths of raping women to fulfil these desires. Rapists do not care about how their actions will affect the victim. Rape is a selfish act because all the rapist cares about is having his sexual needs gratified. He doesn't care about how this evil act will traumatise the victim or how it will scar the victim for the rest of their life. The sad thing is when women do speak about rape and sexual abuse, there are people who are quick to say they are lying and discredit them, especially when it comes to men with high social status. Though there are some women who do lie, this is only a minority. What surprises me is when there are numerous women who come out to say they have been sexually abused by the same man, and people still discredit them. People need to remember that there is no smoke without fire. However, if two men came out to say a particular woman is a hoe, men will be quick to believe this and not question it.
Boys need to be taught from young that girls are humans too, that need to be respected. Boys need to be taught that girls are not sexual objects to be used just for their sexual gratification. Boys need to learn to control their sexual desires. Boys should be taught the importance of CONSENT, and if a female doesn't give their consent or says no, then they should not proceed. If boys are taught these things from young, they will grow to become better men and this can potentially reduce the number of rapes/sexual assaults. Men also need to hold each other accountable, if you see your male friend acting inappropriately towards females without their consent, let them know that their behaviour is not ok. Do not encourage their negative behaviour. Rape is a male problem, therefore it is the responsibility of men to take active steps to deal with this epidemic.
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